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My husband asked me last night what made me so in favor of this whole ‘natural birth’ thing. I don’t think whatever answer I gave at the time was very good, but I think I’ve narrowed it down since then.

I don’t have a history of reacting well to medication. Whether it’s preferring the pain of newly extracted wisdom teeth to the blurry feeling of the pain medication, or the birth control pills that made me depressed,* sudafed and ibuprofen are about the only medications I can remember using that were better than the symptoms**.

There are a lot of elaborations and tangents*** I could go into here, but what I think it really comes down to is based on my history I’m more afraid of what a doctor might do to me than what my body might. Maybe that’s really, really dumb naive thinking****, but that’s where I am now.

 

* Thank you trojans for six years successfully free of both babies and crazies

** Well, and antibiotics and such. Duh, but those are a lot less comparable to an epidural.

*** Such as: I really don’t like being told what to do.

**** Which is part of the whole ‘not in my living room’ stance – if I find out it was a dumb idea, I’d like to be able to change my mind.

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I’m getting a little cranky searching for delivery options in my area. It seems the only two options are fully managed hospital settings, or full-on crunchy granola push it out in your living room. I kinda wish there was something in between, but apparently birth centers aren’t a ‘thing’ in my area, despite the prevalence of crunchy granola living room options. Not that I have anything against giving birth in living rooms…just not my living room. Maybe that’s back to the denial of the previous post, but it just seems so weird. I can’t picture it. I don’t particularly want a medical professional coming to my mish-mash half remodeled house.

Also, I’m not a very crunchy person. I like a lot of the crunchy ideas, but not so much the personality. I’m not spiritual. I’m introverted. I don’t like strangers touching me. These things all seem somewhat in opposition to the crunchy community.

(not that there aren’t crunchy people out there I’d get along with – there are devoutly religious people I get along with, so I’m sure there are hippies I’d get along with, since I probably agree with them on more stuff, but it feels like it puts me in a minority and makes it harder to approach the community)